Tim Sherwood is failing his audition

The Muppets: Veterinarian's Hospital

thank god.

As Tim Sherwood blagged his way through another game as head coach of Spurs, wears ‘is ‘eart on ‘is sleeve, his team turned in another nothing display of huff and bluff that matched.

It was a game that somewhat matched the previous league outing. Minus the comedy capitulation and inept officiating. The opposition had to do very little to win.

All they had to do is breakaway just after a minute had ticked over on the clock, get a bit of luck, score a screamer and then do nowt else. Yet even in that 89 plus minutes of doing nowt else they still managed to tot up more attempts on target than Spurs did.

Some people, as with the display last week, were still happy with a performance that just fell into the old pattern of Pulis or Allardyce ball. Humped diagonal crosses that were easily dealt with, while the visitors could have finished it off in the first half if Oxlade-Chamberlain hadn’t skewed two good chances wide.

The first of these breakaways that saw Chamberlain miss brought Sherwood’s first scene centre stage to the thronged masses. He ripped off his gilet and threw it back to the bench. The passion was there for all to see – ooh, I could crush a grape.

His post match comments were again more of this heart on the sleeve oratory, showing us all that he really means it. It brought to mind two quotes…

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’ve got it madeJean Giraudoux

Well Timmy you’ve got a bit of a way to go yet. And…

Well, for one thing, he’s been badly exposed to overacting – either that or overexposed to bad actingDr. Bob (The Muppets)

We’ve all been badly exposed to overacting – either that or overexposed to bad acting.

He also said post-match that Spurs should be following the template that’s seen Liverpool turn from laughing stock to challengers.

Well yes I’d like to have seen them follow that model. They stuck with their manager, weren’t desperate to cash in on their best asset and removed all poisonous elements that undermined previous regimes.

So that would mean AVB and Bale still at the club while snidy, backstabber, Sherwood was gone. Yes that sounds like a plan Timmy.

Tim then said that the goal/win papered over the cracks for the visitors. Well it can’t be good for a club with title ambitions to be restricted to counter attacks against a team that is managed by Timmy. But again that’s all they had to do as Spurs never looked like scoring.

Saw a lot of praise for Naughton at right back during and after the game – maybe it was just joy he wasn’t on the left. Well the fact he was being praised just highlights what was going on. He had so very little to do in defence, Podoski bar a couple of runs did nothing that needed defending and then even Naughton figured it was all left foot. But in attack while Podoski did no defending Naughton’s attacking was dull and dithering. Time and again there was space for an overlap, allowing him time and space to put in cross from the byline, far more dangerous than his hanging back and putting in easily dealt with diagonals.

Adebayor was praised. Yes he put himself about but for what end? There’s little or no point him being out wide, that should be others job. Out wide he isn’t going to score and he didn’t look like he would all game. even when he had half decent chances.

Chadli gets the usual brickbats but was the most effective forward player before his removal. Eriksen also played his part but come his substitution he was a spent force and had barely featured in the second half. There was boos for that change with little under 10 minutes go. Why was a creative player being taken off while Bentaleb who did very little staying on. But Eriksen was gone, frankly he should have been removed before Chadli who probably should have stayed on.

Eriksen’s departure finally brought on Soldado. With no goal looking like it was coming and them sitting deep, leaving it until 8 minutes to go to bring on the last striker to score for the club was classic Timmy. While Wenger brought off attackers for defenders, indicating his intent, Timmy did nothing.

The much derided transfer sum of £26m is bandied about by Soldado’s detractors. But apparently it’s a 50/50 deal, £13m with £13m in add-ons. Now you wonder, when do those add-ons kick in and well if he’s sold in the summer will they put a dent into any profit.

In the three games following his last goal he’s played 23 minutes.

While it took over half the game for Spurs to register their first shot on target – in the two games under Sherwood against the goon scum they’ve amassed the same number of shots on target as they did in one under AVB, Tim Sherwood, that’s entertainment – it was again down to a great Lloris save to ensure that it went down to the wire.

They didn’t have to get out of first gear and won, quite easily. While Tim Sherwood found the only role his acting abilities are suited to. Tonight Matthew, I’m going to be Alan Pardew. As he got involved in yet another touch line barny. As I tweeted at the time he has as much class as he has clue. A true gooner.

Added: Forgot to say Vertonghen was should have given away a penalty that I was most surprised Mike Dean didn’t spot. So with that the goal and Chamberlain’s two bad misses, with Spurs playing well and them not in the game at all it still could have been a 4-0 defeat.

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