And the cretinous oaf to replace the clown

Steve McClaren - McClown the wally with the brolly
Steve McClaren - McClown the wally with the brolly

is the McClown.

OK so McClown isn’t going to be a direct replacement for the muppet Wright but it’s a major indication of the thought processes at the B.C.C. sport.

Who in their right mind would wants to listen to this failure prattle on about the teams England should have been playing against if it wasn’t for this failure and then there’s that fact we’ll have pay five grand for the privilege.

Well that’s it really the Beeb has handed in it’s resignation from being the countries sports broadcaster. It’s been a long resignation speech, from the likes of Mark Bright, Ian Wright, Peter Schmeichel, Donkey Adams, Gavin Peacock, Dullard Shearer, that screeching bint whose commentaries always seems to have that lifeless overdubbed feel to them, Alan “I hate Liverpool ManUre games they’re always crap but it’s a big game so I have to be here” Green – yes Alan, perfect face for radio, you are that important and everybody just tunes in for you and you alone.

McClown, Alan Green, Tim Lovejoy all in a studio, where is Al Qaeda when you need them?

Their last hurrah broadcasting live football for some time now, they’ve lost the F.A. Cup and England internationals – ah but we’ve got the championship and some Carling Cup games they squeal, yes that’s a real commitment to the sport no doubt the Conference will follow, another few million no problem Mr. Ecclestone, it was painful reading the head of B.B.C. sport trying to justify himself and his department lately – is going to be remembered for employing the wally with the brolly.

You ave to wonder what good commentators, Mike Ingham, and summarisers, Jimmy Armfield, Chris Waddle – though he maybe shouldn’t do the knockout stages as he can’t say the word penalty, it comes out as “pelanty”, that night in 1990 must have had more of an effect on him than first realised, even Stan Collymore for god’s sake, have done to deserve the McClown.


Tuesday night I couldn’t work out which was which but I figured one team was in blue so that must be Wimbledon the other wore red but maybe that was Watford’s away kit.

Though I struggled when they kept mentioning it was the Champions League semi-final, I thought it was “The Big Match” repeat from the 80’s all long ball no two passes strung together, real English football, none of that silky skill continental crap, though I have read someone calling this cultured long passes.

And then at the end the Watford manager didn’t seem to be Graham Taylor but some foreign bloke who looked like Captain Pugwash and talked about as much sense, whinging about the ref not getting his time keeping right, though I suppose technically he was right.

As the equaliser was scored just after the fourth minute of added time and then the whistle went shortly after, when the Watford fullback was stretchered off after about 2 minutes, the big fella upfront for the Dons rolled around for a minute and a half, four subs used 30 seconds each is another two minutes, other incidents that should have been at least five and a half to six minutes extra. But Pugwash seemed to think four was excessive, maybe it’s a foreign metric system he uses 🙄

I have heard some also mention we should feel sorry for the Watford ginger for scoring the own goal, why? If he had ever bothered to learn to use his right foot for something else other than standing on he might have been a bit more confident in clearing the ball and not felt the need to stoop right down to head it. But I suppose someone who is only a sub for Watford can’t be blamed for that, not like he’s going to be earning thousands a week for kicking a ball is it.

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