but does he realise he’s the reason?
England’s 2-1 victory over Norway in the World Cup quarter final was a meeting between two teams that are almost identical.
They really are like for like. Both have a stunning world class striker up front, who hardly ever gets the ball – though England’s does far more work for the team.
They both have overrated number 10s, though England’s at least does turn up in games. They both start with a pair of useless wingers, then bring on another pair of useless wingers. They both have better players sitting on the bench. They both have managers who are the main problem behind any on field failures.
The commentators were most shocked when England went behind, because England had up until that point had all of the ball. It’s almost as if they’d completely forgotten the Mexico game already. You know the one where Mexico had all of the ball then England went two up. And when Mexico had the ball they had done something with it. England hadn’t. They’d amassed one shot, off target in that opening 35 minutes of 65% possession. The Norway keeper didn’t make a save until added time in the first half.
Well, what did we expect with Tuchel putting out a side that meant England were only playing with a maximum of 9 players. Madueke featured in his fourth game of the tournament. he’s been useless in all of the previous ones and amazingly was probably worse in this one. And while he cuts inside, yet again, his fullback never overlaps. Because he’s a centre back. Ah but he does have the best passing percentage in the tournament. Three quarters of which have gone sideways.
In the middle of the park Tuchel starts a player who has just spent three days ill in bed. Picked to start in Miami, where it’s hot and humid. He plays a sick man because set pieces. Set pieces that were utter crap in this game and no matter how many times Lee Dixon and Sam Matterface tell you he’s the world’s best corner taker, have been crap throughout the tournament.
This was all Tuchel’s choice, yet he gets angry when the team doesn’t play well. It would also be his choice for O’Reilly to go inside all the time, so that when Gordon goes inside, there’s no one to overlap because everyone is inside.
The Norwegian opener came after for once Haaland was found with a cross, first of about two times in the time he was on the pitch. Thrown out to Harry who is fouled – but apparently the ref was in the FA’s pocket.
In between their crying the Vikings are claiming this was a dive…
https://x.com/DWil1878/status/2076962637452042703
The Norway winger gets past Tuchel’s right back and with numerous white shirts in the box and very few red he puts a cross in that beats Pickford. I mean with their record of poor crosses to Haaland I don’t know why any of the England players expected it to go to him.
Norway should have been two up but their other winger was England winger greedy when he went for glory rather than play a wide open Haaland in. Though that would be on the basis we think he could actually find the striker with a pass, it’s doubtful.
Tuche’ls defence and midfield disappearing again, no doubt he shouted abuse at Djed Spence on the bench.
It was all level just into added time for once one of the wingers played a cross to another England player. Gordon to Bellingham and England’s number 10. An excellent goal, showing what happens when they actually do the right thing and don’t fanny about. They should have been two one up moments later, for once the midfield playing balls forward and through, rather than sideways and back, then Bellingham with a lovely little poke through to Kane, who was offside.
But there’s my problem with Bellingham, you know he can play that number 10 role, feeding the number 9 like that but did we see it again? No. There isn’t the personal glory in someone else scoring.
Even Tuchel had seen how rubbish Madueke had been, as he was hooked for Saka. Very little changed. Rice also went for Eze. Very little changed. But there you are Thomas. You picked ’em.
The second half continued with Norway’s wingers being useless in finding Haaland with crosses. But led to Pickford having to scramble and when they did find his head Pickford was called into action again. Corner after corner until Norway had the ball in the back of the net again. But… but.
VAR chalks it off due to a massive two handed push by Haaland on Anderson before the ball was in play. New laws. The Vikings crying again. Showing again so many newcomers to the game that think pushing and grabbing are part of “it’s a contact sport”.
It’s a foul, no matter what Norwegians or Septics think.
Norway changed their wingers and it was that like for like replacement. Nusa and Bobb actually could even be worse than the starters. Both of them making it easy for England with their ineptness, cutting inside and losing the ball. Thankfully they didn’t bring on probably their best player, other tha Haaland, Hauge, who had an excellent CL campaign, especially against English teams.
Tuchel’s response bringing on Reece James in the middle of the park and moving Eze to the wing. A masterclass in deckchair moving. His next change made sense with Spence finally coming on for O’Reilly. The second half saw Norway have more of the ball and more attempts. England’s best chances came from the one time Saka got a cross in and Djed Spence chasing down the goalkeeper and blocking his attempted clearance.
Three minutes into extra time Spence squares the ball to Rogers, who came on late in normal time for Konza. From about 30 yards out the Villa man has a bang, the keeper makes a howler, the ball slipping through his arms and Bellingham was the quickest to react to retake the lead.
Not long after England should have extended that lead from the spot. Spence on a marauding run to the byline, then into the box was taken down but VAR decided he’d initiated the contact. Yet if it happened anywhere else on the park a foul would have been given. But apparently according to the crybaby Vikings the VAR wanted England to win.
The rest of extra time was basically England’s. Bellingham made way for Burn, Tuchel was holding what he had. It did help the Norwegian manager taking off his one superstar, replacing him with someone who struggles for goals.
All that was left was for the crying to start. All that good will for their supports wiped out because of the pathetic caterwauling of bad losers.
And so it finished and England are in another semi-final, having yet again not played any real top team. That now changes, with the semi and the final. Will Tuchel change, or will he do the exact same thing he’s done throughout this tournament, his whole tenure?
He said England weren’t good, the pundits are saying that the other three teams have had their tough moments and ugly wins, but for them it’s been one offs, while England have had one good half, against Croatia. Kind they grind their way past Argentina in the semi and then either Spain or France in the final?